Kuch Nazme

Here are a few lines that I wrote in recent past. They're already on my instagram page, but I coun't forget to update my blog right?

So here are a few ones!

If you don't know already, here is the account that will provide fresh-out-of-the-oven works and much more:

Follow me on Instagram here @aenimentis

My confidante - rain

Dark clouds, with the rain, bring nostalgia.

Memories buried deep, in a corner of the heart,

Hidden from everyone, concealed from ourselves too.

Somethings you have forgotten ever existed,

The rains germinate them.

With the first drops comes petrichor,

The smell, it makes you a kid.

Deep inside, you wish schools get cancelled,

Only to realize that you now attend a school called life that takes no days off.

A hot 'cutting' is the craving now.

Rain gets heavier and thoughts get denser,

Staring out of the window, you think of her.

Nothing specific, just her, and the memoirs.

Rain aggravates the thirst to find the meaning; of that something unknown.

Tea gives way to a glass of neat scotch.

There is a rain within you, something you have saved for the dry summer days.

The rain within you, and the rain outside,

When both worlds collide,

Sparks fly out of the water,

Sparks never meant to be ignited!

Rain brings the desire for solitude.

For really you want no thought,

Just you, and the solitude,

And the blank gaze at the drops falling on your palm,

Then slipping out of your hand.

Rain is a person, unlike any other weather.

He comes, he destroys, he gives life…

Your wish for solitude is in fact a wish to be alone,

With rain, who knows all your deep secrets,

Because you have confided in him!

आँसू

वाकिया एक, इंसान दो...
ख़याल अलग, सोच अलग:

***************************

आसुओं से नज़र धुंधली हो जाती है,

आओ तुम्हारे आँसू पोछ दू,

कुछ नज़ारे साथ मिलकर देखते है।

***************************

अश्क़ बहाती हो तुम जैसे बरसते मेघ!

रो लो, नहीं रोकूंगा मैं,

मुझे मिट्टी की खुशबू पसंद है।

***************************

Aolani

You call it love?

The fear I have of losing her,

The desire I have to care for her,

The passion for craziness, to share with her...

On a journey to the unknown

That I have embarked on,

No signboards I see here,

The path created as I march on...

A fellow traveler she came as,

And all I hope for is the paths to run parallel.

If this is what you are calling love, then,

To love or not to love, that is the question...

She's all that!

She is a cat! She hasn’t lost her wild instincts. She defies rules because rules are made for dogs. Ask her to sit, stay, run; she will ask you back, “Why?” And if you persist, she will still do what her will says. She lives in the society, but is wary of any new member. She is a social animal, but she likes to be by herself. She is independent, you forgot to feed her? Never mind, she’s caught herself a meal anyway. She has claws, she hides them well. If you pet her nice, she will purr, but only for so long as she wishes. If she doubts you, or if you are not doing it right, you remember the claws? She is free, she is the queen of her world!

She is a rock, a mountain. A big one. Immovable, small things don’t matter much to her.

She has jewels and precious minerals inside her, but she hates it when people want to come in with the intent to take it all away. People who come near her, try to dig caves and tunnels, but she won’t let them, like insides are just for her. She’d throw rocks at them if they try to.

Those closest to her are rivers. They are around her, they may shape a few of her curves, but they don’t get to seep deep into her. At times, she may feed them with some water, but not always.

She is a volcanic mountain, insides are boiling with so many things and ideas that keep her unstable. But from outside, she is snow-capped. She looks so cool. And her majestic nature makes her beautiful and at the same time intimidating.

And when there is a drizzle on that mountain, and the sun shines, there is a sweet smile in the form of a rainbow.

She is a free thinker. She has a crazy imagination. If she wished, she’d make her own world of fantasy! Where you could play drums in a library, where cars would run on water, where zebras would be spotted, where rainbows would have a million shades, where she could be a magician, where the moon would be triangular, where grown-ups would be kids, where children would never cry…

She is real, and her fantasies are real. She needs to know this, and she will… One day...

Sorry I am!

We met one fine evening

Me, in a tux and a bow.

She in her emerald gown

Radiant her glow.

In a few days, we knew it,

Forever we could go.

But some douche bag I was

Things hurt my ego.

She gave me her all

And all I said was 'no'!

Now I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

I need to lay low.

So here, take my stone heart

And bury it in the snow.

Coz I'm sorry

I never surrendered to love...

The Counselor

It was the second day Som sat sulking. Didn’t feel like doing anything, couldn’t pay attention to anything. The images on the TV moved and he sat staring at it blankly.

In comes the counselor friend, Nick!

One look and he knew what his friend was up to!

“Oye Hero, wassup? Valentine’s hangover?”

“Hmm.” That was all the reply Som could muster.

Nick walked straight to the fridge, grabbed a beer and plopped on the couch. Taking a sip, he said, “Ditched you? Wait, let me guess! Over the phone?”

Frustrated, Som asked, “What do you want?”

“Pass me those chips. And what is this shit you are watching? Hand over the remote.”

Som, wordlessly, did as he was bid.

The search for a good show was over and Nick’s mind was free to ask.

“So tell me, did she say: ‘It won’t work’ or ‘I don’t want to hurt you anymore?’”

“You are the enlightened one! You have guessed enough already, make more guesses!”

Nick reduced the volume of the TV and said, “Listen! From one friend to another - no one will give you this knowledge for free. Experience and life have taught me all this. So take it.

“It was your first love! First love is good. Great if it is her first too. Well, that doesn’t mean it comes with a guarantee! But yeah, you can enjoy it.

"The second one though is an eye opener. You realize love is not that fairy tale you thought of, or if your first love relationship was pleasant, this second one is remote from pleasant. Again exceptions prove the rule. Some need many second ones for their sleepy eyes to open. They are the more hopeful lot. A sprinkle of water is not enough sometimes. A full pail is required.

But yeah, it is rough. Either the other person is just playing with you, or so you think. Or simply that you think this is not the love that you want.

“Third love is a myth. Don’t get me wrong, there can be third relationships. The part of you that wants to love is dying. And you don't want the guilt. You feel you are becoming more and more like your first. So you don't want that third. You don't want more people to blame you. Like you blame them. Your conscience is hurting already for having fallen for the 2nd time. For you had hopes. I’d rather say perhaps coz you were brave. But now it is different. You might be brave, I don't doubt it. But there is a side that is keeping you from tormenting someone. Like you were betrayed.

"Suddenly all of it becomes clear to you. Why your first acted the way she did. You realize that you walked in the same shoes. And you regret for what you think you did. You know how much it had hurt you and can only imagine how much it would've hurt your 2nd.

"You start to see yourself in a very negative light. You feel no one deserves you because you are getting more and more like the person you once hated. And you hate yourself for that. But that doesn't help. In no way will it ever do. You will run away from people who are attracted to you. You feel like the flame. You see the moth coming to you, but for all you know, it will be better off at a distance, feel the warmth, get some light. The closer it gets, you will burn it, and you will kill that innocent creature.”

Som interrupted, “And you speak all this with experience?”

“Oh yeah, totally! I used to be the moth. Now I am the flame!”

“You recognize the problem; please enlighten me with the solution too!”

“Only one solution! Stop the blame game. Que sera sera! Focus on other things, read, take a vacation, go out. The last thing on your mind right now should be getting in a relationship.

“Before that, I’d ask, ‘Do you know why she broke up?’”

“Yeah. She told me what made her decide. Not that I believe it but yes, she told me some stuff!”

“Ok. Try to understand her position, see if the pondering helps you believe the reason she gave, and take it - satisfactory or not. If she wants to be with you, she will be back. And don’t act foolish if she does come back! If you are with someone then, reject her offer, but be friends! Remember the days you were together and how happy you were. Crunch, crunch, crunch. But my words are not final. You can find love as frequently and easily as you get a six on a fair die! Trivia time: in archaic English, die is to have an orgasm. Anyway, talking of a fair die, actually life is both fair and unfair based on how you look at it.”

TV was the only source of voice for some time before finally Nick said, “Damn I should be a counselor!”